"The Day I Stopped being a people-pleaser [ Messiah Syndrome]

 The hardest life lesson I learned changed my perspective on life. I may be right or wrong, but why do good people suffer the most? I believe when you don’t have strong boundaries when you’re a people-pleaser and don’t know when to say “enough” or stand up for yourself, especially when you’re being exploited, bullied, ridiculed, or abused you will end up living with painful stories.

The worst betrayal comes from our loved ones. With enemies, you’re wary; you eat with a long spoon. But with a loved one, you don’t see it coming. Just like Julius Caesar, who survived multiple stabs from his cabinet members but died from the one stab from Brutus, his trusted friend  that’s the betrayal you can’t bear.

It feels like an unexplainable, sharp pain when you’d go to the moon and back for people, and they can’t even meet you halfway. I never knew that being overly empathetic could expose me to people who want to drain me nonstop, unprovoked, because they’re insatiable. I’ve been in a situation where I thought if I never asked for anything and kept showing up even when I was exhausted, my genuineness, patience, kindness, and love would shield me from the brunt of it. Y’all, it didn’t.

That taught me that some people are insatiable and to them it doesn,t matter whether you give an arm or not. You could give 99% of yourself, and the 1% you don’t give because it wasn’t convenient for you will bring you hate and resentment. 

One lesson I’ll never unsee is that cruelty people show you without cause is their real personality. I carried heavy weight and secrets, and I paused my own life in ways I shouldn,t  have in the first place, so others could thrive. And my reward was wickedness. 

That’s why I urge you my readers to know the difference between being a nice person and self-sabotaging yourself by enabling the unfair treatment you received,  I’ll tell you for free: no one can hurt you without your consent. I can vividly remember going from a strong-willed teenager to a docile woman who lost her voice on the altar of keeping the peace. But when the awakening came, it came like a hurricane. I stopped gaslighting myself into believing the obvious I stopped pretending not to see reality.                                                  

I learned that people who cause others pain without self-regulation or self-reflection know exactly what they’re doing. So sometimes, the unforeseen life experience comes so that you can finally grow, and to see life in another dimension. Instead of sobbing all the time be grateful"  that was your stepping stone to  becoming "the version of you who is more self-aware because you could've still been naive, if you didn't reach your breaking point. 

In conclusion, pay attention to patterns there are some mistakes that can change your life trajectory forever, don't be too hard on yourself, you were just a human who thought every other person out there is sensitive or realist but we have humans in sheep's clothing masquerading as either family or a partner. 

 The goal is to create awareness, and to make you feel you are not alone, many people have walked your path, a hundred times. Do you mind sharing that story that made you reach your breaking point and how that made you strong?

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