Life With Cindypounds

What Enablers Actually Do to Keep Toxic Behavior Alive Enablers of toxic behavior and people who invalidate the victim’s experience are just as guilty as the perpetrator. Flying monkeys are the people who side with your abuser. Most of them play it safe because of what they stand to gain, and they don’t want to fall out of favor with the toxic person. Enablers dismiss your experience without hearing your side of the story, yet they believe the toxic person even though they weren’t there. It’s hypocritical. Some of them are being manipulated and brainwashed into playing along. Enablers are as guilty as the oppressors. If they stopped protecting the wicked one and held them accountable, the abuser might change. But narcissists keep disrupting peace because they know they’re surrounded by people who make excuses for them and cheer them on. I’ve been in a situation where I was surrounded by enablers of wickedness who knew I was innocent  they knew the truth yet they told me to lower my...

A dysfunctional home is one where toxic patterns run the family system. That can mean parents verbally attacking each other in front of their kids, or children witnessing domestic violence, alcoholism, or abuse. It can also mean abandonment and neglect. Living in that constant chaos, the fear, the trembling, the yelling, the emotional instability forces a child’s nervous system to adapt just to survive. The impact doesn’t vanish when they grow up. Flashbacks, the echo of those moments, and everything they witnessed stay in their memory, like an error that can’t be deleted. That’s why the way we behave, our mannerisms, and our lifestyle often trace back to the environment we were raised in. People who grew up in calmer, healthier homes tend to be more loving and less chaotic. THE CYCLE YOU ARE HEALING FROM CAN REPEAT ITSELF IF YOU ARE NOT SELFAWARE.  If someone from a dysfunctional home doesn’t get support or therapy on time, they risk repeating the very patterns they’re trying to h...

    If you’re a woman, you already know the world doesn’t always protect us from injustice. Our rights are often disregarded, and a woman without money can face prejudice and segregation and we are meant to be comfortable, bear it and be happy without questioning anything.  That’s why I keep saying the same thing, again and again: and I wish I knew this earlier on, have your own paying skill or job before you move in with your partner or start having children. I’m not saying don't trust blindly and love, but trust and love alone can not protect you if push comes to shove. Someone can promise to be the one to keep you on your feet, and then betray you and bring chaos into your life. When your entire livelihood revolves around your partner, you lose more than gold and silver. You lose your voice, your fundamental human right, your freedom, and your exit door. At first, the idea of staying home to raise the kids or quitting your job can feel sweet, even romantic. But with a ...